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michael7
Titel: THEY WALK AMONG US  BeitragVerfasst am: 25.07.2006, 23:30 Uhr



Anmeldung: 24. Mai 2005
Beiträge: 354
Wohnort: Nashville
THEY WALK AMONG US

Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old, still working fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: "Free to good home. You want it, you take it". For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal. It looked to good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: "Fridge for sale $50". The next day someone stole it. Caution .. They Walk Among Us

=================

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the Nor th?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the East, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with that stuff." . . . . . . . . THEY WALK AMONG US!

====== ====

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific" . . . . . . . . . . . . . . THEY WALK AMONG US!

==========

My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving". &n bsp;. . . . . . . . THEY WALK AMONG US!

==========

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car it's designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk . . . . . . . . . . THEY WALK AMONG US!

==========

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were e discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount. . . . . . . . . THEY WALK AMONG US!

==========

I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?" I explained that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned . . . . . . . . THEY WALK AMONG US!

=========

I couldn't find my luggage at t he airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet? " . . . . . . . . THEY WALK AMONG US!

=========

While working at a Pizza Parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces. Yep, . . . . . . . . THEY WALK AMONG US.


AND, NOT ONLY DO THEY WALK AMONG US, THEY REPRODUCE AND THEY VOTE TOO!

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Debian Social Contract
 
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stryder
Titel: Re: THEY WALK AMONG US  BeitragVerfasst am: 26.07.2006, 02:33 Uhr



Anmeldung: 26. Jun 2005
Beiträge: 389

michael7 hat folgendes geschrieben::
My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were e discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount. . . . . . . . . THEY WALK AMONG US!

... and didn't immediately order another 10 cases? There's more of them then you think. Sehr glücklich


Zuletzt bearbeitet von stryder am 26.07.2006, 10:12 Uhr, insgesamt ein Mal bearbeitet
 
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slam
Titel: RE: Re: THEY WALK AMONG US  BeitragVerfasst am: 26.07.2006, 08:46 Uhr



Anmeldung: 05. Okt 2004
Beiträge: 2069
Wohnort: w3
Zitat:
AND, NOT ONLY DO THEY WALK AMONG US, THEY REPRODUCE AND THEY VOTE TOO!

Yeah, such stories make us re-thinking democracy - right?
Every efford put into more education counts - and that includes information about birth control. Winken
Greetings,
Chris

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sokminer
Titel: RE: Re: THEY WALK AMONG US  BeitragVerfasst am: 26.07.2006, 23:12 Uhr



Anmeldung: 11. Feb 2005
Beiträge: 32

there was a thread on Linux questions.org (I think) something to effect of 'the stupidist thing my linux professor/teacher ever said.' THEY WALK AMONG US
 
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devil
Titel: RE: Re: THEY WALK AMONG US  BeitragVerfasst am: 27.07.2006, 00:19 Uhr
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Anmeldung: 06. Mai 2005
Beiträge: 3087
Wohnort: berlin
my neighbour always leaves the lights on in all rooms but his bedroom. on asking him, whatfore, he said: well, you know, those cats i have, have different waking hours than we humans, dont want them to knock their heads and wake me up.
i said nothing, even though the energy balance of the planet was in danger. Winken

greetz
devil

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hubi
Titel: Re: RE: Re: THEY WALK AMONG US  BeitragVerfasst am: 27.07.2006, 00:49 Uhr



Anmeldung: 22. Jan 2006
Beiträge: 1296
Wohnort: Budapest
devil hat folgendes geschrieben::
my neighbour always leaves the lights on in all rooms but his bedroom.


Happens to me as well, but: I just fall asleep. Happens more often on weekends and on holiday Mr. Green

No, don't have cats.

hubi

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michael7
Titel:   BeitragVerfasst am: 27.07.2006, 01:13 Uhr



Anmeldung: 24. Mai 2005
Beiträge: 354
Wohnort: Nashville
devil wrote:
Zitat:
the energy balance of the planet was in danger

Lachen Lachen Lachen

Must not have those cats bumping their heads in the dark.

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Cathbard
Titel:   BeitragVerfasst am: 27.07.2006, 07:35 Uhr
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Anmeldung: 11. Aug 2005
Beiträge: 451
Wohnort: Australia
Heres one a friend of mine sent me that fits here nicely.

Back in the 1980s, Yosemite National Park was having a serious problem
with bears: They would wander into campgrounds and break into the
garbage bins. This put both bears and people at risk. So the Park Service
started installing armored garbage cans that were tricky to open -- you had
to swing a latch, align two bits of handle, that sort of thing. But it turns out
it's actually quite tricky to get the design of these cans just right. Make it too
complex and people can't get them open to put away their garbage in the
first place.
Said one park ranger, "There is considerable overlap between the intelligence
of the smartest bears and the dumbest tourists."

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The real pirates by Courtney Love
 
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nemesis
Titel:   BeitragVerfasst am: 27.07.2006, 22:20 Uhr



Anmeldung: 20. Mai 2005
Beiträge: 102
Wohnort: Würzburg
My wife use to keep the spare key to the car, in the glove compartment, and couldn't understand why I got upset when I accidentally locked my keys in the car...
 
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ice
Titel: Re: THEY WALK AMONG US  BeitragVerfasst am: 28.07.2006, 22:56 Uhr



Anmeldung: 25. Feb 2005
Beiträge: 106

As any geneticist will tell you, stupidity is so widespread because it is a desirable trait.

My collegues and I have examined stupid people for years if not decades, and our studies show that Homo Stupidus is actually a superior genetic mutation. People with the stupidity gene are immune to paralisys-by-analisys syndrome and exhibit none of the doubts and uncertainties that cripple the inferior Homo Sapiens. The stupid acts quickly and have faster reaction times (it may come as a surprise to some, but in the survival game acting without thinking is a better strategy than thinking without acting). Finally, and more important, Homo Stupidus has a higher birth rate.

Today they walk among you. Tomorrow they will walk ALL OVER you.
 
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hubi
Titel:   BeitragVerfasst am: 28.07.2006, 23:15 Uhr



Anmeldung: 22. Jan 2006
Beiträge: 1296
Wohnort: Budapest
nemesis hat folgendes geschrieben::
My wife use to keep the spare key to the car, in the glove compartment, and couldn't understand why I got upset when I accidentally locked my keys in the car...
That's great. In the last 20 years more than once my car was opened, and of course the first place they go for is the glove compartment. I do not lock it anymore, keeps damage lower, and nobody can use my pair of extra specs anyway.

hubi

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eco2geek
Titel:   BeitragVerfasst am: 29.07.2006, 03:47 Uhr



Anmeldung: 02. Mai 2004
Beiträge: 471
Wohnort: Portland, OR, USA
Speaking of which, here's a tip for you Americans: Do not keep your car title and insurance paperwork in the glove compartment. (If your state requires you to carry proof of insurance, carry it in your wallet.)

Why? 'Cuz if your car's stolen, the first thing you'll need to give police is your license plate number, or VIN. Unless you're one of the few who've memorized your plate, it won't help to tell them, "It was all in the glove compartment."

Not good to leave the spare key in the glove compartment either, for obvious reasons. Winken
 
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Cathbard
Titel:   BeitragVerfasst am: 16.08.2006, 05:56 Uhr
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Anmeldung: 11. Aug 2005
Beiträge: 451
Wohnort: Australia
This is hilarious, Its not quite a "they walk amongst us" but I guess thinking a dolphin would participate in a war is a bit silly.

'Flipper's Bleep, mate. The dolphins have had all
this amazing publicity but as soon as they put one in
the water it shot through. There's a war going on and
Flipper goes AWOL. If you put one to work in Sydney
Harbour it would mark a million things because it
can't tell the difference between a washing machine
and a mine. The bottom line, mate, is it's a fish.
It's also a very smart fish so how do you know it
hasn't just gone off for a feed instead of working and
then thought, "Hang on, I'd better mark a few things
or they won't give me any fish when I get back".

- An Australian Navy diver on the use of dolphins in
mine clearing operations in the port city of Umm Qasr

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The real pirates by Courtney Love
 
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